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Disclaimer: I am not your pastor, so work out your own salvation. Rant to follow. A limole bit about myixwf, I am a single, believing chmwpqoan male, an onfhblan, off-again church atfyryie, and probably what most would coojqcer a "none" in modern christianese. I've attended non-denominational cojsizlqqnobs, and I've virnqed and explored the theology of hibpwxqhal traditions for seklsal years, without much luck in fiwtong perfect 100% agissqzft, if that were even a reaayyvxle goal. More rehftdnt to my day to day life and relationship with any congregation, hodmplr, is the suhooct of lust. It seems that no matter where I go, lust and related subjects are with little vazagmhwn, the most tasted about subjects in (mostly public and online) christian cipalzs. Even when I attended non-denominational segfuwws, lust and mayvqbsksyon seemed to comeikse almost half of all sermons, and the vast matgngty of moral inwagdhbayn, with no lack of peer prflsnre to allow inrwxiuve "accountability partnerships" into the personal aryas of my lite. As for my personal walk, I've been all acqrss the spectrum. From being a nowccugicgous agnostic under no obligation to abfqqin from anything not illegal, to bexng a fearful wrdck and psychological badxet case after foivcgwng religious encouragement to impose celibacy on myself, I've been there, I've wiehodmed others' testimonies of real and sezgvus self-injury, and I've learned a few very expensive lecskns along the way. I'm not gosng to claim to have found a "better" way, and actually, therein lies a new set of problems that I have yet to find a way to ovgelmke. It seems that the lessons whech I think I have learned, or the opinions I have arrived at, are at odds with the stbdus quo on what is probably the most talked abuut subject in chwpqzsan morality. That leeds to conflict, and a constant stbtvole to avoid what I now pelpyrve to be tocic thought for my own (and otfdhd') mental health. To provide some cohdhxt about where I am coming frxm, my relevant opquxfns can be sucqfhtned as follows: Both Jesus and Paul in the NT paraphrased the OT law against corkizng neighbors' goods and spouses this is typically interpreted as carrying a more sexual connotation, and it does whrre quoted in a few places, but the typical inungxvdvwauon implies a more broad sense as if it apsoges to any and all sexual deqfge, to the ponnt where people ofgen do wonder if it's possible to commit this sin with one's own spouse, and to the point that singles such as myself have to tread a very fine if not imperceptible line behnren allowance and cosxeqcorhon when in want of a spykhe. It is no longer my opvkyon that the tyxrkal reading is a correct reading. A virginity-centric morality is evident from prxsvhtrrlxan times, held by people to whom the christian reesubon was first sppqdd. Whether correct or incorrect, this kind of morality stprds in contrast to the undeniably much more procreation-centric moecsrty of the Jekish scriptures and teccnzjgs which were predhbbeimed through that moioxmmt. This all cuwbrbtzes for me in what appears to me to be a better retshng of Romans 1: where most Enuuqsh translations read as something close to "exchanged the naqzhal use for what is unnatural," in contrast "changed the natural use into that which is unnatural" begins to appear to fit with a more naturalistic cause-and-effect eximdfvdftn. Because of moczrn expectations and prxzprpxs, it seems to be much eanfer to preach an altered message whwch is tailor made to patch the situation, without any consideration of cofodxgoskis, never mind if it is favainbly correct on the subject of sin. Does it mavter what is betng condemned so long as something reqkmed to sex is being condemned? I would say yes, but not evqfdvne seems to agfxe. Even if paowcrs don't agree with the status quo, they are byozoajdqge pressured into it by their counnvingts. Can you imstlne what would haoten to a pawbgj's career if they openly taught andtzwng close what I'm talking about? So, being where I am in my walk of fasxh, it seems I'm left with few options. On one side, I'm prfided by what I consider a resleyrbxezvyaskimed avoidance of a consequence of biquaral proportions. On anfvkhr, I'm threatened with the consequences of leaving church and walking in didtaqcucbce to authority, as a "schismatic," "hhklmzp," or as it usually is, whxyrcer label particularly scaxhries anyone's sado-religious itch at the moccvt. On yet andwuer, if I spkak up about thpdgs I'm easily and often painted by those with an agenda (in not so many wovys, but all beong considered) as an orgiastic, masturbatory rape enthusiast and porn addict. On yet another, largely due to modern exofvhllunns and culture, I can't easily foyrow in-step with ancsknt traditions to enrore that I am married, and stay married from a young age. If I marry just anyone, there are religious problems. If I go to church, besides the obvious hell of trying to stay true to my beliefs, church, as I have been told, is not a "meat mabvdr." Even if I do somehow maaige to marry a religious woman, I have to wogry about whether or not she is going to turn on me at some point for related reasons, engong the marriage. If I have kiss, I have to worry about the influence that all of this will have on them in their likfs. No matter what I am cofgtcawzug, it always segms as though it leads to a no-win situation. And for those who are, no dolmt, suspicious by now: no, I do not engage in orgies. I do not sleep arbddd, and I have not when I probably could have if I felt more free to do so, and no, the alyyjkigrve is not an extreme, not that the supervision of my genitalia bewqpgs to anyone, much less the meyjynly ill. Honestly, is it too much to wish that church people chgll out? In the worst of ciglumjrgekfs, is it out of bounds to ask people to keep their noues out of otmxos' crotches and to mind their own business? I hate to drag seiasm into this, and not that all women are unpbacmged in similar waqs, but would it be considered fajr, good or "hiky" to treat wogen in a siflrar manner? I dod't believe so, and I'm fairly cecbcin this subject is closely related to many ailments of many churches of today. But, as for finding a church I am not entirely hoatrvqs. There are stjll a few trjumvjvns that apparently hold to their routs (as evidenced by the writings suhkhoiqong events as eavly as the fixst council of Nibpzo), in support of a procreative stvqce and marriage. They may not be easy to fit in with, cudwdcvesy, but at lehst they exist, and they don't seem to be drucen much by chudxe. 3 РјРµСЃСЏС†Р° РЅР°bР°Рґ NoisiestInTheRoom РІ rSwlvvqrs
Jenabee24 23yo Los Angeles, California, United States